


Sociopath or Just Misunderstood?

by Zanne



Series: Possessed Car 'Verse [8]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-19
Updated: 2011-06-19
Packaged: 2017-10-20 13:24:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/213240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zanne/pseuds/Zanne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Guess what? Our Yellow-Eyed Demon decides he might need someone to talk to. He goes to visit Sam and Dean's favorite therapist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sociopath or Just Misunderstood?

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'ed by lyonie17. Italics indicate the therapist speaking, ALL CAPS are the therapist's notes, regular text indicates the Demon. Kripke owns all. (Originally posted: 2/7/07)

_You must be new to the area. I haven’t seen you around town.  
_  
                                                                 CUTE – HAS A WINCHESTER LOOK TO HIM.  
                                     LOOK UP SAM AND DEAN’S NEXT APPOINTMENT – GET HAIR DONE.

  
      Yes, ma’am. Just came to town on some business.

  
 _So Mr….John D. Mon, what brought you here today?  
_  
                                                                                                  SEX ADDICTION? PLEASE?

  
      I work with genetics and I do a bit of…motivational speaking – convincing people to do things they’d be   
      too hesitant to do on their own. Keeps me really busy.

  
 _So you’re a bit of an overachiever, I take it._ BORING!

  
      Yeah, you might say that. I’d take over the world if I had the time.

  
 _You must be pretty hard on yourself…feeling the need to fulfill all of these impossible goals.  
_

      No, not impossible…just time consuming. I’ve got a team working on it.

  
 _It must be hard on your family._                                                     PLEASE BE SINGLE.

  
      Yeah, it really kills them sometimes.                                                DAMMIT.

  
 _I hate to be rude, but I think you might need to make an appointment with your physician. Your eyes show signs of yellowing. I’d advise a check-up.  
_  
                         COULD BE JAUNDICE, HEPATITIS, MALARIA – CALL CLEANERS AND STERILIZE OFFICE.

  
      Awww, Doc. Didn’t know you cared.

  
 _It’s my job.  
_

      And it’s my job to offer you the deal of a lifetime. How would you like to get the thing you want most in    
      the world?

  
 _I just want my patients to be happy and healthy.  
_  
                                                              AS LONG AS THEY STAY CRAZY. I NEED TO EAT, TOO.

 _Let’s get back to you.  
_

      I’m trying to bargain here!

  
 _I see you don’t deal well with failure._                                            SCHEDULE MANICURE.

  
      No…my Father is pretty strict. Never complimented me when I destroyed a civilization…er,    
      corporation. Always demanding more and more. Soon one soul…er, stock wasn’t enough. Then it   
      had to be an entire family. Now there’s this whole gene manipulation idea – I came up with it! Sheer   
      brilliance! But he complains it’s not happening quickly enough. I tell him that babies are useless - let   
      them grow up, go to Stanford, and things will turn out great, but nooooo, it has to have immediate   
      results, like with Pompeii…er, Posturpedic. Made quite a killing with that!

  
 _Hhmmm…I see.  
_  
                                          DADDY ISSUES – MAYBE GROUP THERAPY WITH WINCHESTERS?

  
 _I’m sorry to say that we’re out of time._

  
      Time is inconsequential to me.

  
 _I get paid by the hour._

 _Please see my receptionist and we’ll see if we can fit you in next week.  
_  
                                                                                  LOSE HIS NUMBER.

  
      I’ll be looking forward to it, Doc. It’s not often I meet someone who understands me so well.

  
 _Thank you. Betsy! Send in my next patient, please!  
_   



End file.
